Groundhog's Day - the nightmare
I had one of my recurring nightmares last night.... this one I've been having off and on for more than 20 years. I always hate it because it takes place in a very large, old and very scary looking building with more rooms and square footage than meets the eye. It's decrepit and gross in places and without going into too much detail, there can be a lot of disgusting solid matter lying about.
What was strange about this dream was it woke me up around 6:15am (usually it's a 2 or 3 am thing) and as soon as I got up and realized it was 'that' dream I didn't want to go back to bed because I was sure I'd fall back into the dream. I got up, went to the bathroom and then got myself a drink from the kitchen to delay the inevitable. I finally crawled back into bed and sure enough I started dreaming the damn dream again. I couldn't stand it..... I even knew it was a dream and kept saying 'wake up!' to myself.
What happened next is what happens to so many of us in dreams; the whole scenario changed and became a whole new place. My mom was there and we were in a charming bistro/cafe setting and we were sitting down at a table enjoying lunch. She was telling me very important things that I had to do right away. Of course, as soon as I woke up I was so damn disappointed and I even said out loud "But you're dead, how could you be here?" And for the life of me, I cannot remember a single word she said to me. It was so important too!
So as much as I'd like to remember what she said and to see her again I am not willing to go back into that horrible reoccurring dream again. It pops up about once a year now and I'm happy to have had my quota for 2011.
One of the main reasons I won't watch horror movies is because my overactive imagination can turn them into even sicker dreams. I already can take something so ordinary and make it a horrible dream - I even have scary music and sounds readily available in my dreams.
I hope I have a happy dream with my mom in it soon. The one I had before this one was scary and bizarre too. I feel like I suffer enough from missing her as it is.....to have to deal with these awful circumstances I dream up is way too much.
I'm feeling really beat up emotionally. I'd like to have a happy dream for a change. Too bad dreams can't be ordered like Netflix.
What was strange about this dream was it woke me up around 6:15am (usually it's a 2 or 3 am thing) and as soon as I got up and realized it was 'that' dream I didn't want to go back to bed because I was sure I'd fall back into the dream. I got up, went to the bathroom and then got myself a drink from the kitchen to delay the inevitable. I finally crawled back into bed and sure enough I started dreaming the damn dream again. I couldn't stand it..... I even knew it was a dream and kept saying 'wake up!' to myself.
What happened next is what happens to so many of us in dreams; the whole scenario changed and became a whole new place. My mom was there and we were in a charming bistro/cafe setting and we were sitting down at a table enjoying lunch. She was telling me very important things that I had to do right away. Of course, as soon as I woke up I was so damn disappointed and I even said out loud "But you're dead, how could you be here?" And for the life of me, I cannot remember a single word she said to me. It was so important too!
So as much as I'd like to remember what she said and to see her again I am not willing to go back into that horrible reoccurring dream again. It pops up about once a year now and I'm happy to have had my quota for 2011.
One of the main reasons I won't watch horror movies is because my overactive imagination can turn them into even sicker dreams. I already can take something so ordinary and make it a horrible dream - I even have scary music and sounds readily available in my dreams.
I hope I have a happy dream with my mom in it soon. The one I had before this one was scary and bizarre too. I feel like I suffer enough from missing her as it is.....to have to deal with these awful circumstances I dream up is way too much.
I'm feeling really beat up emotionally. I'd like to have a happy dream for a change. Too bad dreams can't be ordered like Netflix.
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