Holiday blahs
It's been 6 weeks since I lost my mom and it feels like eons ago and yet like it never happened. I'm obviously in denial still despite my brain being very conscious of it. I had a dream last night where I was at a very fancy party at a restaurant and I looked at a table and discovered my mom sitting there. She looked awful...as if she'd been through an accident and had surgical scars all over her face. But she was alive and talking and all the while I kept saying 'But you're dead...'. I found the dream unsettling but I know things like this happen as our minds process what's happened. I don't remember what she said in the dream but I won't forget how scary she looked to me. I'm going to have to think about this bizarre dream. I am still not really in the holiday spirit. I feel so bad for Mark because he wants to celebrate Christmas and it's all I can do to just keep the house semi-clean. I have no motivation. I've done some shoppin