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Showing posts from September, 2013

Roller Coaster

Well, it's been a bizarre week for me in terms of my diet. I have been daring to almost break the rules in terms of eating but not quite. I haven't wanted a salad all week so I have had to have spinach in my shakes (which I actually LOVE) plus roasting veggies for dinner (which I also LOVE). Salad has been my mainstay though. I am at the point where if there's something interesting on it like meats, eggs, other tasty veggies I am able to eat it without dressing. Don't ask me how... it just tastes great!  But this week, I couldn't even bear the idea of a single piece of lettuce. So that was the start of the week.... Then I started wanting another grande size mug of coffee. Which meant having more of that yummy coconut creamer that I am allowed to use for one mug. I have been pushing the limits on my fats, let's just say.  And the one thing about drinking caffeine is that you have to replace that cup with another cup of water. I've been able to do that until

You Gotta Have Heart

I always promise I won't duplicate blog postings (I have one specifically for my IP diet journey) and while it's not a duplicate, it will show something I'm really proud of today. I had a physical which means I also had to do lab work to check my glucose and check cholesterol and stuff. I was still reading high on my blood pressure unfortunately and I had to do a home check for 10 days for my doctor. It's still high on the diastolic number (the lower BP number) so I have a hunch I'm not getting of meds anytime soon. While that's a bummer, at least she's aware that my meds probably need a tweak and that's okay. Still awaiting my glucose numbers (diabetes - which I came in as full blown positive last summer) to see if I've brought that down which I know I have since IP works on the pancreas and insulin production through the cutting back of carbs (sugar). In the meantime, my cholesterol numbers arrived 24 hours after my visit to the lab. I had forg

Hallelujah

The drought is officially over! I am finally employed....albeit, it's a very, very part time job and the job relies on me to push my services but it's doing what I LOVE. I'm officially on the adjunct faculty for West Sound Academy! I'm going to teach music (choir) and also teach private lessons there. Seriously..... this is what I've been dreaming of but never thought I could get after such a long wait. I know that it'll start out small but I'm doing what I love which is teaching music on a smaller scale. I was never meant to be in the public school system and a long time ago I realized that teaching music 5 days a week in a school setting wasn't my thing. I knew I had to be involved with music and with kids but it was hard to figure out how to get this to happen without being poor, LOL. Well, my dear friend Gretchen (we go all the way back to high school) convinced me almost 20 years ago to start teaching privately. Her daughter Siri was my first

Food bites: Sugar Free BBQ Slow Cooker Chicken!

I have to take pictures next time... all the evidence of the food is GONE. It was that good. Since I'm on a strict low carb/no sugar diet, it's been hard for me to give up certain things. Rice and pasta have probably been the worst. I want sushi in the worst way but it will still be there when I finish the first phase of my diet! It will be one of several rewards I have when I hit my goal! Anyway, the last few days I've been bombarded by Famous Dave's ads, commercials for BBQ sauce, etc., etc. I LOVE going to Famous Dave's for their chicken wings platter. Their Sweet & Sassy bbq sauce is absolute heaven for me. Well, right now that stuff is like poison which has made me really sad. It's funny to think that I would want something so much.... but then I think about it and realize it's the SUGAR ADDICT in me saying to take it. Yeah, the tang of the vinegar, the yummy tomato and spices are all terrific but it's the SUGAR I want. I really want to yell

Done

Such a destructive power, that little Miss Jealousy. I have been slammed by it all weekend. Not me being jealous of others but others being jealous of me. I'm kind of at a loss. I've been feeling a lot of loss.... and not just in my personal body weight and body fat either. It seems like people are falling by the wayside.  I am not asking people to leave and they're not making any great efforts to walk away from me but they certainly are saying or doing destructive things toward me. I really don't know what to do. Well, in once circumstance (my MIL), I have to accept that she will never change. This is the same behavior she's shown to everyone in her family all of her life, I guess. She has no friends (well, not MY definition of friend) and most of her family basically tolerates her. My husband, one of the kindest people in this world still loves and adores her and tries so hard to break through her wall. He makes headway and then with a snap that wall is magi

Freeze Frame!

I had a moment today. Well, I had a huge moment yesterday to begin with.  My MIL is staying with us  for  the summer months and we hadn't had a fight yet. Well...that changed last night. What it was about is unimportant. What it did to me, or should I say what I let it do to me was.  I was so angry at her that I told her to stop being rude to me, and that her timing of her behavior sucked. I had an opening night for a show and my mind needed to be in a good place. I also needed to eat my dinner before the show and then bring plenty of water as well as my protein shake to sustain me throughout. Well....none of the good stuff happened. I brought my salad with me but ended up having 3 or 4 bites. Did I remember the protein shake? Hell no. I was lucky to remember to bring water and to not tell her to fuck off before slamming the front door. Yeah.... not my proudest moment. I slammed my front door in anger.  What I really WANTED to do what to actually punch my fist through a wall. I

Pray.....

Those that know me 'really' well know that I'm Catholic. I guess it doesn't matter if someone does or doesn't know that. I just hope they know I'm a believer in God - at least through my actions and deeds. I have been praying a lot lately. Well, for years actually. About much of the same thing too. I knew I had been battling a raging depression for quite some time and I thought I was praying about it. I realize I was not truly praying for what I want. Don't get me wrong, what I was asking for was a real thing. It just dawned on me after I got a perfect email from my darling husband early this morning I was praying for the wrong thing.  I have been asking for something very specific - an actual tangible item that can be held in my hand. That's really not how I'm supposed to pray. Now I've never claimed to be a good Catholic. In fact, I'm probably a mediocre one at best. I have tried other faiths but none have ever provided me with the comf

Closet shopping

Well, I spent a good part of my early afternoon, reorganizing my side of the closet (Mark's side is tomorrow!).  I went through almost every item and tried them on and made a decision whether to keep or give away. I must have done well because I pulled at least 20 hangers out of there. I'm actually wearing pants that I haven't worn in 3+ years! This is an awesome feeling! Closet shopping is a pretty cool thing. I will have to do it again, probably in about 2 weeks to see if the pants that I felt were too tight are okay or are they just the wrong cut for me no matter how much weight I lose? It should be fun. I know I'll have a heck of a lot more room in that closet as soon as I can shift down another size! Speaking of which, when that happens I will officially have to go out an buy a new wardrobe! All I have left are the size I'm wearing in my closet with the exception of 2 pairs of jeans I purchased from Old Navy just so I would have pants as I lose this weight, L

Sounds of Silence? Ear wax chronicles of me

This is gross, yet fascinating. Lots of women have a disgusting and gross fascination with the body and its excretions. Seriously.  I'm one of those weirdos that gets joy out of popping zits and squeezing blackheads....yup, I'm sick and twisted but I love it. IF this is TMI for you I won't be offended....just so you know I'm talking about ear wax. If that's still too gross for you, don't read. Otherwise, the next few paragraphs are all about my ears and wax. So I had my yearly physical yesterday and everything except my blood pressure (which I expected to be high) and my diabetes numbers were normal. Since I haven't had a glucose test in a year, my doc wanted to do another blood test so I'll be doing that tomorrow and hoping that my new weight loss and very clean diet (no sugar!) has all but eliminated my high glucose numbers. I'm actually banking on it. So, the only other comment (besides, "oh we need to schedule a colonoscopy!") w

I'm melting.......melting.....what a world.....

WARNING: there are a few rough swear words in this so if you're offended, don't read. I know I'm trying to keep my diet blog separate from this one but because this is more commentary as opposed to posting facts and figures about my diet for the week, I think it's okay that I blather on about a few things related to this journey I've started. So at my last weigh in (yesterday), I ended up losing 5 lbs and 3.5 inches but I went up about 2 percent in my body fat. Well..... that's an interesting thing, isn't it? The one steady thing that had been happening on my diet was that my body fat was ticking in a downward trend these past 4 weeks. Yesterday, it jumped 2 percent overnight.  That, my dear friends is the results of hormones. I want to scream sometimes when someone mentions that damned word. It's what makes us who we are of course but why in the hell does it have to screw with our body fat readings on a $5000 scale? So yeah, I have an amazing and