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Showing posts from May, 2014

Pity - Party of One?

You know...... I hate it when people whine. I absolutely hate it. Even when kids do it it just about makes me want to crawl out of my skin. I don't know why it is but that's a huge pet peeve of mine. BUT..... that is ALL I want to do today. I am feeling SORRY for ME. I am so sick and tired of not being able to get a full-time job. I have applied for literally hundreds of jobs and the number of calls or interviews I've gotten from them can be counted on ONE HAND.  I am beginning to feel desperate. I don't know what else I can do. I have prayed and prayed and prayed. I have redone my cover letters, redone my resumes, talked to everyone I know and then some and I still can't seem to find the right job. Hell, I can't even find the wrong job or the temporary job. Now I know I'm not applying at restaurants or fast food places.....yet. I am not applying at places that require me to lift 50 lbs because I just can't do that. I am trying to avoid some lines

Happy Anniversary (NOT)

We are a weird sort....we humans. We celebrate birthdays, holidays (religious and Hallmark), graduations, retirements, weddings, anniversaries. The obvious thing is that it's beginnings and endings. We celebrate the beginning of life. We celebrate the end of school, the end of a career.  We certainly don't 'celebrate' death..... well, actually I guess a wake could be considered a celebration of one's passing. Some people do choose to celebrate the end of a marriage too. ;-) Yet we remember those very important dates when something or someone ends. The date we lose someone really important or an institution like marriage. Actually.... the true date of my divorce of my first marriage (which I know was in October) escapes me because it was a long time ago. Not that it wasn't traumatic or unimportant because it was. It's just I've moved on (as has my ex) so that date doesn't hold a grip over me. The death of a loved one (related or not) is always t

Mother's Day and other Hallmark holidays

We're approaching a 'Hallmark' holiday and it still kills me. The sting is a little less biting but it still hurts. Mother's Day and Father's Day just about do me in. It took a long time for the regular holidays to stop being so painful but these two days seem to slice my heart up and serve it on a platter every time. My dad's been gone for almost 11 years. He died the Friday after Mother's Day so I have a funny memory of him on that last Mother's day. That's a great gift. But despite the smiles I display when I think about that day, I still get tears in my eyes because I remember I had 5 more days after that and then he was gone. Each day, he got progressively worse and the last 2 days of his life he was basically in a coma. Those 2 days were painful and filled with lots of tears as I talked to him but he didn't have the energy to speak or even open his eyes or to squeeze my hand back. I said my goodbyes and said how much I loved him and told