Luck Be A Lady

A theatre friend of mine reminded me of the poem "Rainbow Bridge". I guess it's not so much a poem as it is a story. It helps me to know that Emmy Lou is home again. I know she feels content and happy and is patiently waiting for Mark, me and the rest of the pack to arrive in our own time. I still miss her so much.... and yes, I'm tearing up again but it's okay.  I just miss the simple things like seeing her waiting for me at the front door or patiently watching me cook dinner. Hearing her little nails click on the linoleum or hearing her little breathing noises as she slept are some of the things I miss the most. My heart hurts but it will get easier with each passing day. Here's "Rainbow Bridge" for those of you that don't know it: Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our specia...

Well, lightening does strike twice I guess. We lost our beloved Emmy Lou yesterday afternoon. It happened quickly. She was home with us and she went from starting to eat and wanting to be with me enough that she walked from her bed to the bathroom door one evening to complete lethargy and losing control of her bodily functions yesterday afternoon and passing in a matter of minutes. Emmy 2009 She was a dog that my student, Emileigh found back in 2005 wandering/running on Highway 305 in Poulsbo. We don't know if she was lost, abandoned or what but she turned out to be the sweetest, smartest, kindest and most wonderful dog anyone could ever be lucky enough to call their own. Emmy was a Pom/Sheltie mix with a guesstimated age around 5 when she was found. Anyone who saw her commented on her beauty and grace. She wasn't super friendly but she would wag her tail and let you pet her if you approached. I truly think she had the best of both breeds in her but ultimately she acted l...

I am sitting here nervously this morning anticipating a horrible meeting but hoping for a miraculous report from Emmy's vet. She's been there for 24 hours being pumped with antibiotics and fluids and pain meds to fight the kidney infection and pancreatitis she seems to have taken on. I don't want to lose a second dog in 48 hours. I've taken the loss of Jessie much harder than I expected to. She was very old and we didn't have her full time until my mom passed away so my feelings of loss are intermingled with melancholy about missing my mom on a whole new level. It's a complicated kind of grief to say the least. With Emmy, this is about my child. Yeah, go ahead and tell me this isn't the same thing. Explain that to me and I'll still manage to punch you right in the face. Emmy is OUR first child, plain and simple. She is made us a threesome and we became a family. Dear God, I don't want to have to deal with losing her. Not yet...... And yet....w...

So Long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehn, Goodbye I am writing with a very heavy heart today. The dog I have known for nearly 16 years finally made her way to the Rainbow Bridge. Jessie was nearly 17 years old - a miracle for any breed let alone a Shar Pei. Her breed has an average lifespan of 8-10 years so everyday she was alive was a major miracle. She was such a calm and dignified dog for most of her life. I actually accused her of being more cat than dog (hence her nickname, Catdog). She was funny and loyal - she would always lay by your side or by your door at night keeping guard and watching over us. She loved being outside, watching over her huge yard on sunny days, even with that black fur coat of hers absorbing all that heat. She stayed by my dad's side as he got close to dying. She was my mom's shadow when she was alone making sure she would never be "alone". Saying goodbye to Jessie - March 20, 2012. We kept her with us for the last 17 months of her l...

Oy veh.....my mom always told me the worst part of getting old was watching everyone around you die. Eventually one of you is left standing and you are alone. I still wonder what she was doing the day she died. Since I didn't have the luxury of speaking to her that day, I don't know if she was feeling okay or not. I still cry now and then and I still hurt every day thinking about it. I try not to let it eat away at me like it used to. I just hope that she went quickly. She was still warm when I found her so I know it couldn't have been too long. Still, the guilt wreaks havoc in me - I wonder if there was anything I could have done differently leading up to that day. My beautiful mom was 80 when she left this world. She didn't look much over 60-ish so when I heard about Davy Jones (of the Monkees) dying last Wednesday I was so dumbstruck. He was one of my childhood crushes and I always admired him. Davy was only 66 when he suffered a massive heart attack. He was a ...